Mat Master Manuel -- The Lost Years

Sharp-eyed Surfmatter regulars may have already spotted the missing time frame of our mini-bio of Mat Master Manuel Jose Ramone ... what was Manny into during the 70's?

Long story short:

Coming from a proud line of visionaries, Manuel's uncles formed the world's first punk band in the raucous atmosphere of 1930's Havana...

In addition to popularizing left handed guitar playing, they also started a "home page" for their musical endeavor, "muypunk.com."

Since it was 60 years before the internet, their traffic numbers were low. They did, however, go on to coin punk's seminal cry...

By the mid-70's, Mat Master Manuel was disillusioned with life as a mat surfer. He had fallen into a deep depression with the termination of the Converse/Hodgman raft, and moved to New York's East Village. His motivation was to explore the decadence of the modern world so that, umm, he might better understand it.

One night, while on line to enter a local nightclub, he met a wannabe rocker named Jeffrey Hyman.


They discussed Jeff's options as a musical talent, and the young man was blown away with Manuel's grasp of all things relating to heaven, earth, and rock and roll.

Manuel desperately wanted Jeff to experience the ocean, so he could apply the "wisdom of the deep" to his musical vision. With the world's supply of mats dwindling, Manuel was forced into the shaping room to create a single fin roundtail hull for Jeff...

Taken with Manny's charisma, Jeff abandoned all hope of originality. He adopted Manuel's uncle's preferred musical genre -- punk -- and begged Manuel to let him assume the Ramone family name.

"This is acceptable, my friend," Manuel said. "But I must insist on these three things. One, you and your band mates must cloak yourselves in leather and torn denim, as they represent the yin and yang of the material world. Secondly, you must honor my uncles by joining their web site when the internet is eventually invented. And finally, please allow me to be photographed with you before your first gig."

"Yeah, whatever man," The Ramones replied.

Addendum, 10/27/08:

A little know fact: Manuel wrote the original lyrics to Blitzkrieg Bop. His version was entitled The Hodgman Bop, and was penned in Hindi script. In a nutshell, it involved having consensual sex on an inflatable raft. The Ramones, wary of crossing the boundries of good taste, never recorded the tune with Manuel's lyrics.

Manny did manage to assert himself in later years, and persuaded an Irish/Hawaiian ukulele duo to cover Blitzkrieg Bop. Also, a surf guitar version of many Ramones hits was produced by Manuel's daughter, Lourdes, herself an accomplished punk mat rider. ("Accomplished" in the sense that she can surf a mat without popping it with her lip ring.)