Happy Birthday to Mikey!

 

More Ruminations From Mat Max

 

Hi PG,

 

The latest controversy Down Under is a raging debate as to whether or not wetsuits actually keep you warm! Of course it was me who sparked this blasphemous indignation. I'm claiming that cold water washing through negates any qualities of insulation. However I am a minority of one. 

 

The rest of the crew here in Gisborne staunchly deny the obvious fact that wetsuits are purely a fashion statement reflecting weak minded group think. Utilizing the afore mentioned theory of surfmatting relativity I suggest foregoing buying that new 4/5 and purchasing another 4GF so as to further the quest for eight-billion sales worldwide. Furthermore, a class action lawsuit against all wetsuit manufacturers would go a long way towards earning enough money to buy the whole planet...

 

Cheers,

 

Max

From Mom

 

From Mark

 

Where Your Holiday Dreams Come True!

 

From Ben

 

From Mikey

Mikey over at Pack Ratt Records and Junk in San Diego is the resident mat guru. Follow along as he schools a newbie on the nuances of mat surfing in his own, inimitable style!

4746 El Cajon Blvd, San Diego, CA 92115   (619) 581-9168

From Aaron

 

From Mat Max

 

Mat Max's Theory of Everything

As I am now suffering a severe existential crisis I am seriously questioning the relativity of things. For example I have seven mats and must employ a double-blind scientific comparison in order to choose which one to ride. Lo and behold, I always make the right choice, because they all work great! The same goes for inflation. Statistical analysis shows that the larger the surf the more air volume is required. And also the smaller the mat. 

You don't have to be Albert Einstein to come up with your own E=mc2 Theory of Surfmatting Relativity to make the most of your quiver. The key element to this stunning intellectual inquiry is to have a mat in the first place to experiment with. To sum up my theory on the relativity of things, I calculate that if everyone on Earth bought a 4GF, Gloria and Paul would earn 8,000,000,000 x $360.00 which equals $2,880,000,000,000.00, making them the richest people in the world! Take that Elon Musk, Bill Gates and Jeff Bezos... 

So, let's all get out there and convince everyone we know to purchase their own Paul Gross creation in order to drive eight-billion worldwide sales. Everything really is the all the same but different. Thus, now that you are completely confused by this drivel and bollocks like I am, get out in the water, and come up with your own bogus pseudo-scientific rationale for not going to work on a sunny day. Blind them with science!!!

Max